James takes on the world!

Laos is know as ‘The Land of Smiles’ and for good reason. The people are incredibly friendly, chilled-out and welcoming especially considering the years of war and isolation. This has also helped to maintain it as one of Southeast Asia’s most intact and pristine environments.

We started our tour of Northern Laos in the capital city of Vientiane by taking advantage of the French cuisine at some of the restaurants and cafes which remain as a result of the French occupation during the 19th and early 20th centuries. We toured the very small capital by hiring two bikes and cycling to some of the many Buddhist temples. It was 38°c so this was done at a very, very leisurely pace.

The following day we took a bus the the popular backpacker haunt of  Vang Vieng. We spent the afternoon slouched in front of the TV in one of the comfy restaurant/bars showing Friends. The following day we wet ‘Tubing’. For those of you that don’t know, this is where you hire a large inflated inner tube and get dropped off 3km up river and float back down to the town. Along the way there are many shack bars that line the river banks. The people working at these bars then cast a line out to you and pull you ashore to the bar. You then have a few drinks followed by some jumping off very high platforms, rope swings and zip wires. Finally, you continue to float down the river going to other bars along the way. As you can imagine this was great fun.

We then took a long bus journey to the beautifully relaxed town of Luang Prabang. It’s stunning Buddhist temples, colourful nights markets, bright orange robed monks and French provincial architecture quickly lulls you into a somnambulant bliss. We spent our first full day doing an Elephant trek through the dense forests. We were allowed to ride the Elephants bareback which was fun but pretty scary when it was walking down or up any of the steep hills. Our Elephant seemed to have a bit of an irritating itch on its bum so whenever it walked past a large rock that it decided looked like a suitable itching point it would bend down and have great enjoyment relieving the irritation. However, this made it very difficult to hold on as we were thrown around all over the place, much to the amusement of the others on the trek.

The next day consisted of the bumpiest, twistiest and noisiest bus journey that I have ever taken. Our young driver considered himself the latest rally superstar and had Gisella felling sick for almost the entire journey.  We arrived in a town called Luang Nam Tha which was a stopover for one night before we headed to a small village called Muang Sing which is situated near the border of the Yunnan province of China. We had booked to do a 3 day trek to experience the Akha hill tribe which is thought to have originated around 1500 years ago. Sadly the night before we were due to start the trek Gisella was very ill after something that she had eaten the day before. We decided that as we had both paid a lot of money to do the trek, then I would do the first day without her and we arranged for a motorbike to take her to the tribes village where I would be staying the following morning.

I started the first days six hour uphill trek with another couple and two guides, one who spoke Akha and Lao and another who spoke Akah, Lao and English. We walked for a few hours and then stopped for lunch at a beautiful waterfall. Our lunch was cooked on a fire by two tribe members who made some very tasty stuffed fish with sticky rice and very, very hot chili paste. After lunch we continued our trek through the forest and along the way we had to remove lots of leeches which had found their way into our shoes. Luckily I managed to catch the ones on me before they sucked too much of my blood. This horrible experience meant that we completed what was supposed to be the remaining three hours of walking in only 1½ hours as we half walked and half ran.

We arrived in the Akha village where we would be spending the night. The tribes people started to return from the fields in the early evening and we took a stroll around the village. The Akha people were all extremely surprised to see us and stared at us everywhere we went. Our Westerner appearances scared some of the children so much that many of them ran away crying. We found out later that there had not been a trek to this village in many months so seeing tourists was not the norm for them. We were amazed at the way that they live their lives, living in much poverty yet remaining so happy. Our guide informed us that only half of all the children born tend to live into adulthood and that they are married at the age of 13-16. As we walked through the village we were amazed when we saw children riding Buffalo bareback, infant boys calving objects from wood using a Machete, young girls looking after babies and teenagers carrying rifles after a day of hunting in the woods. It was clear to us that children are expected to grow up and help their parents from a very young age.

When we returned to our hut that was to be our accommodation for the night, some tribes people were preparing our dinner of Buffalo. Our Akha guide, the head of the village and a few other locals insisted on us drinking some of their homemade 60% Lao Lao (Lao Whiskey) with them. After dark they sang some traditional tribal songs to us and in return they asked us to sing a Farang (Foreigner) song but all we could come up with was Frere Jacques after we had heard their Akha equivalent. It was a great evening and as we looked into the darkness there were fireflies glowing orange everywhere around us. After more Lao Lao we were given a traditional Akha massage before we went to sleep.

The next morning Gisella arrived in the village feeling a lot perkier. We had breakfast and then set off across the lush green rice paddies to the first of three villages that we would be visiting that day. When we arrived were were taught how to do some cotton spinning which we were all useless at. One of the villagers came to us with her two little boys and our Akha guide informed us that she was asking us if we had anything that we could give them to get rid of the measles and lice that they had. It was very hard saying no, especially when you could see that they could not afford to go to the doctor. We were only able to give her some soap and antihistamine cream.

We then continued our trek to the next village where we ate lunch and played games with the children before going to the final village where we would be spending the night. When we arrived I asked if I could ride a Buffalo and after our guide translated to the Akha people they gladly agree. This was also very amusing for the tribes people which had gathered around us. When it became dark a group of children spontaneously came and sang to us. It was so sweet and they seemed to be having so much fun. The evening finished with more singing from the tribes people followed by another traditional massage.

On our last day we arrived in our last village and we discovered that a traditional wedding was taking place. We were ushered into a room where the ceremony was taking place where we saw the 15 year old bride and 16 year old groom who had already been married once before. They were sat back to back as they were not allowed to look at each other. As part of the ceremony we had to witness the sad slaughtering of a pig (sorry Mum) which Gisella and I decided not to watch. The head of the village then placed the liver of the pig on the floor and read the future to see how many children the couple would have and what sexes they would be. We were then plied with more Lao Lao and this was all at 10am in the morning. Later in the day the bride would have Buffalo dung thrown at her to test her strength.

Gisella, just before she fell in the rice paddies.

We left the village feeling slightly shocked at what we had witnessed and a bit worse for wear from the Lao Lao. We were then picked up after completing the ‘Akah Experience’, and it really was an experience. We spent our last two days in Laos flying back to the capital where we sorted out Visa’s for Vietnam and then took a flight to Hanoi.

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